The Boy Learns New Things

Obviously, this is a period in childhood development that is associated with rapid growth and development of new motor skills.  So here are some of the new things Jonathan has learned over the past month.  P.S. He is now 20 months old, and I can’t wait until he turns two so I can stop counting months and just say, “He’s two years old, dammit!”

Creeping: I’ll play Candy Crush on my phone or browse Facebook while he’s running amok in his playroom, going from toy to toy like a crazed, drunken monkey.  His little puppy that he can ride is usually right up next to the couch, behind where my head is.  So he climbs up on the puppy, and breathes in my ear like a total creeper to see what I’m doing.  Of course, his motor skills have developed enough now that he has started…

Launching: He climbs up on that puppy, and straight up launches himself OVER my shoulder, landing headfirst in my lap.  I guess it’s good that I have a little extra weight on me.  It’s cushion for when he decides that suicide might be the answer for a second of fun.  And then, of course, he laughs hysterically, shimmies down off my lap, and goes to do it again.  He has also learned how to launch from behind the couch cushions, which he often rearranges so he can be in his own little fort, to the coffee table that he pushes up against the couch.  I sense a lot of, “GET DOWN OFF THE ROOF!” going on in my future.

Jumping: This is just hilarious.  In the past week and a half, he has really mastered jumping.  His favorite time to jump (besides when he’s in his crib) is when I’m running his bath and Paul plays with him upstairs.  Even better if he’s naked.  It has also added an interesting move to his Hot Dog Dance.  First, he jumps a bunch, then he sways back and forth, alternating from foot to foot, and he ends his routine with droppin’ it like it’s hot.  I don’t even know where he learned that, but he has thwarted every attempt to video this amazing phenomenon.  I will try harder to record this.

Opening Doors: This would be cute if he didn’t think he needed to throw the door open with the force of Thor’s hammer, slamming it against the wall.  But he’s learned.  Thankfully, he hasn’t quite figured out the lock on the front door, but I know that’s coming soon, too.  Before his bath, he likes to open and close the linen closet door, venturing in every time he opens it for a few seconds before deciding the linen closet doesn’t really hold anything interesting, and then closes the door.  Repeat ad nauseum.

Animal Sounds: He’s had “neigh” down for a while now, but he has added “cock-a-doodle-do” to his repertoire.  Sometimes it actually sounds like “cock-a-doodle-do,” but most of the time it sounds like, “tickatickatickadoooooooo!”  It’s still super cute, and I love that he responds with the sound when I ask him what a rooster says.

Words: Not many new words here, but Paul’s constant repetition of “Go Kings Go!” while he watches the hockey playoffs has rubbed off on our young, impressionable little man, and when Paul asks him to say, “Go Kings Go!”, he responds, “Gogogo!”  So Paul wins this one.

Furniture Arranging: Every single time I leave the room – it doesn’t matter how long I’m gone – I come back to a piece of furniture moved somewhere else.  This started with the coffee table, which is the lightest and easiest thing to move.  He then graduated to the couch.  In the past week, he has figured out how to move our heavy ass shoe chest across the floor, too.  Bottom line: this kid is too damn strong.

Turning on Toys: Jonathan has figured out what those little switches on his toys do, and about an hour into his playtime is when I’m surrounded by the unique cacophony of every single toy in the house on and going at the same time.  I cherish the time when he’s napping or in bed for the night because it’s finally silent.

Cleaning Up: We used to have to ask him if he was hungry first before he’d clean anything, and he’s still hit or miss on whether he wants to be a big helper that day, but now before I feed him lunch, I’ll ask, “Can you put your toys away, please?”  And he does it.  And it’s glorious because that means I don’t have to put all that crap away.

And finally…

Peeing in the Potty: I’m taking a very slow approach to this, but it appears I need to speed it up a little bit.  Every night now before I put Jonathan in the bathtub, because he will inevitably pee in the bath water, I try to put him on his potty.  The past two nights, he has peed on his potty before getting in the bath, which, of course, results in me heaping praise upon him like he’s won a Nobel Prize.  Hey, the sooner he’s out of diapers, the better.  If he keeps this up for the rest of the week, I’ll start trying to put him on the potty more during the day, and maybe I’ll be able to get him out of diapers during the day by the time he turns two.

So, in closing, his terrorism has taken on new forms, and he finds new ways every day to give me heart palpitations.  Here’s a picture of the boy doing what he does best…inciting terror in everything he surveys.

Don't let that cute face fool you; it's evil he's plotting.

Don’t let that cute face fool you; it’s evil he’s plotting.


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